“Love in The Time of Cholera” – Reflection

Chapter 4 Reflection Being in control of your life completely is a bit impossible in these times. Moreover, it was even more difficult during the time period of the book. Usually, a man is the head of the house. But, in fermina Daza’s household, she was the head of the house. Dr. Urbino, though a man held in high esteem in the community, was a very passive man in his household. Their household demonstrates a change in the roles of the genders.
Fermina, due to her personality, has adopted a more dominant role in their marriage, while Dr. Urbino has a more passive role. Fermina, throughout the years, have assumed a dominant rule that no one in the house is over. Prior to her marriage to Dr. Urbino, when, upon her return from the trip abroad, her father recognizes her newfound maturity and grants Fermina control of the house. Fermina, now far more mature and capable than ever, is accustomed to being in control. She is the secret emperor of the household, while Dr.
Urbino is sort of a figurehead. This also explains why she is so exasperated when Dr. Urbino’s mother usurps her domestic control. Fermina hates Dona Blanca so much because Dona, in many aspects of her character, emulates Fermina’s father, Lorenzo Daza. Like Lorenzo, Dona exerts her power over Fermina, and uses this authority to control her. As with her father, Fermina is powerless to fight back, for retaliation against Dona Blanca would only be futile, and cause unwanted strife within the household.

For the first time since her return from her journey, she is belittled and that pisses her off to no end. My mother and I have a constant power struggle in the house. I think because of our extremely similar personalities, we are unable to get along without conflict most of the time. My mother has raised three children before me, so she knows what to do when raising children. She has a set of expectations that is very strict because it has been tried true through three generations before me.
They have been methods tested and steeled through her experiences with my older sisters. I try to resist her dominance because i refuse to just give and and let her completely dominate my life. So, when i refuse to give in to her established expectations, conflict is created through both of us. We both try to exert our dominance and our strong personalities prevent us from giving in. My rebellion disrupts the absolute power she thinks she has as a parent. It is hard to give up something you’ve had for a long time.
With Fermina, it is her dominance of being the head of the house for so many years. With my mother, it will be her authority as a parent. People aren’t too willing to give up their positions of power. After what they may have been through to obtain that position, it would seem plausible as to why they wouldn’t want to give it up. It is in human nature to be greedy, and also we don’t like things changing too much. The older you get, the more you dislike it. But, i think we should all learn to embrace the changes we have.

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